Does size matter?

I remember when I first moved to Southern California many years ago I was told that virtually all the cars I'd see would be either worth under $300 or over $30,000 (which would probably be double that now), and there seemed to be some truth to that, as in those days the value of the car seemed to correlate to the size of the income. In fact, the size of the car seemed to correlate to the value of the car as well. Most luxury cars aren't big anymore. To have a large car now connotes lower social status (old Cadillacs, for instance), higher age (Crown Vics, for instance), or utterly absent intelligence (Hummers, for instance). No, Lincolns aren't Lincolns anymore, and the German luxury cars are for everybody now (You can buy a two-year old E-class for under $25,000, or buy a new "entry class" for not much more), though Corvettes still are for middle age and older crises, and wannabes will still rent cars they cannot afford to own.

The status cars aren't big anymore, but now park themselves and have lots of gadgets (like fans in the seat to keep your back cool). Status is now a different kind of image, not necessarily of wealth, though you'll probably have to pay more than the car is worth to display that image. Smart car, Mini-Cooper, Prius, Cube, Phaeton, vintage anything, Scion, the new Camaro, and so many others put new spins on you-are-what-you-drive.

Yet size still matters in some respects. The new mini-vans, called SUVs (I don't know where the real SUVs went), impress the soccer-moms with increasing heights above the road. And large car speakers remain status symbols for small-brained and soon to be hearing impaired youth. But it is really with trucks that size matters. Ford Rangers and Mazdas are OK, but a never-pampered 10 year old F-series or Silverado is a real truck. As Sam Walton, founder of Wal-Mart once said, "Why do I drive a pickup truck? What am I supposed to haul my dogs around in, a Rolls-Royce?" With your basic beat on it pick-up, size is good, but now some trucks aren't really trucks anymore. I'm not talking about the big rigs, for if you spend a high percentage of your life in a Kenworth then by all means make it cool and comfortable. Rather, I'm talking the "sports utility trucks" and other high-gloss, bed-linered, 18-position bucket seat vehicles that are mostly for show. I guess the Avalanches are OK, though I really haven't made up my mind about them, but why would anyone own an Escalade or H2 "truck?" There are not many vehicles cooler than an old, beat-up, can-count-on-it-everyday pick-up.