This is mostly for the young women, but there is some applicability to the young men as well. There is a time, typically between late middle school/junior high and early college, that girls in particular must choose a path. I see so many intelligent girls that become overly "outer directed" in their concern with friends, dating, social matters, and things. They subvert their intellectual development to social satisfaction. There is a fair amount of social pressure to do so, and in fact letting one's smartness show can have some social disadvantages at this age. So the two paths are to emphasize developing mind and individualism, or to emphasize being accepted and liked. While the two aren't necessarily mutually exclusive, for many the diverging paths reduce to trying to be the inner-directed, studious individual versus the outer-directed, popular cool kid. There are several variations, of course, such as jock, stoner, organic, artiste, etc., but the main thing I'm talking about is the choice do develop one's intellectual capacities or not.
The result with the latter is that these girls grow up never having developed their intellectual potential. Further, as older women, they often become vapidly consumed with appearances and how they appear to others through physical characteristics, marriage, home, children, possessions, etc., often to the point of competitiveness (I drive a Mercedes, my son is an honor student, my daughter got the lead in a play, I still wear a size 6, and all those things that I hope impress you). But the day will come, sooner than you think, that while drinking your third martini at lunch with friends that really aren't, wondering why your face lift hasn't kept your husband from cheating on you, you realize that you chose the wrong path. Your mind is empty, your looks are fading, and the ultimate irony is that the things you desired most turned out to lie on the other path.
There's still time to get back to the right path.