Imprinting

It has been said, though I can't remember by whom, that one's values are largely in place by age seven or so, which makes most of us, to some degree, products of our caretakers. If you doubt it, have you yet heard the voice of your parent come out of your mouth? It can be frightening, but they are there in your head. (And there are plenty of people who pay large sums to get those voices out of their heads.) I have so frequently seen young girls suddenly become the mirror of their mothers as they age, and the rebellious teen mature to be the apple not fallen far from the tree. The foods you like (such as mom's home cooking, in the days when moms could cook), the sports teams you support, the religion you espouse, and on and on, are likely merely products of your upbringing rather than free choice. As adults, will you explore other perspectives, places, experiences, etc., to make preferences based on choice rather than conditioning?

So Remote

I have faint memories of having only a couple of fuzzy channels to choose from as a little tyke, but for much of my childhood there were the three black-and-white major networks, a PBS station, and perhaps two UHF stations if the weather was OK. Then we got a new TV, and that was a huge deal to see Gilligan "in living color." And by the way, the classic debate- Ginger or Maryann? The correct answer is Jeannie.

Now the cable system has again changed their channels and numbering system, as apparently I was beginning to learn where things were. Now the channels go up to 1951! There are likely some holes in the line-up, and a good many of them are pay stations, but so much redundancy and parsing the demographics/psychographics ever finer. Sixteen free news stations (plus 3 HD news channels) and more than that again in various language news channels. Two horse racing stations? Fourteen HBO options? and on and on. By the time I go through the electronic guide, the shows are over.

The Domestic Cold War

I have a friend who says that every morning his wife moves the recliner several inches back to where she thinks it belongs, presumably for aesthetic reasons. And each evening, he moves it several inches towards the television, presumably for utilitarian reasons. And so the dance continues unspoken day after day. My wife and I have several of those unspoken, unseen tiny battles, many of which have been going on for years. An outside light on or off, a steamer on the counter in front of an outlet or not, which side of the cookie jar shows frontwards, and many more petty, seemingly meaningless situations. Why doesn't one of us just let it go? Rookie mistake. We each have our reasons for drawing those little lines in the sand that must be drawn. Why don't we just talk about each of those things and come to an agreement? Things that single people say. We've been down that road before and know that the road leads to Armageddon. But the battle must not escalate to the point of a nuclear holocaust. So we each pretend the perpetual minor skirmishes do not exist. And so I move the trash barrel five feet to the left. Again.

More supermarket shennanigans

Related to pricing errors are the vexing stocking/signage errors. Those little shelf tags supposedly informing consumers of savings opportunities are too often little more than decoys. Sometimes there are conditional purchase requirements not stated on the tag (but "they're in our circular" or "on the end cap sign," etc.), or "small print" deceptions (applying to only a portion of the line, or a particular size, stated clearly on the 6 point type beneath the sale siren call). However, far more common is the sign/tag that doesn't precisely match the stock (a different size, for instance). It is mentally exhausting to maintain this level of vigilance against pricing errors and deceptions, and one might argue that why bother, just buy what you like, but have you noticed the four dollar loaves of bread? So often the irritation is not that the store is out of the sale item, but that it is not.

To err is human

At the grocery store yesterday: Checked my receipt and found an overcharging error. I should go to the customer service desk to get my money back, and probably get the item for free, but the line is four deep and I don't have time to wait for a buck and a half. They win again.

A couple of decades ago, when I lived in southern California, I saw a TV report that found that a reporter who purchased a typical market basket of goods found errors at 23 of the 25 supermarkets visited (or some similar number). Since then, I usually try to check the receipt, and more often than not will find an error, even in this age of electronic scanning. So when Stop and Shop overcharges me, which is about half of the time (better than it used to be), if I notice it, I have to decide whether it's worth the trouble to do something about it. What is remarkable is that in the literally hundreds of error incidents, the error has never, not even once, been in my favor. Admittedly, managing price changes for so many items is difficult, and I probably buy sale items more than most, so errors are more likely for the things I buy, but I suspect my experience is hardly unique. Businesses complain how much they lose to shrinkage, waste, and the like, but I wonder how much extra they make on these undiscovered and unrecovered overcharges of consumers. As usual, caveat emptor.