Alphonse and Gaston

I let a lot of people trying to merge into traffic cut in front of me, but have developed some rules for doing so.  First and foremost, if the driver is on the phone or texting (or really doing anything other than driving), s/he isn't getting in.  If the driver has tried to force his/her way into the lane by inching forward so that half the car is sticking out into the road, I'm probably going to try to keep the bully in (unless there's a real risk of an accident- it's OK to make a point, but don't be stupid about it).  If the driver is not paying attention as I slow and stop, I won't wait forever- sorry, you missed your chance.  If the driver just got to the corner, sorry, you haven't done your time yet and earned the break.  If there's a passenger begging to let them in, that's a judgment call.  The same applies to the driver who has rolled down their window* and asks to be let it in. You have to judge the sincerity and necessity of the plea.  Clueless driver, made a mistake, really in a hurry, I'll probably let that person in; pretty girl just trying to manipulate me, expensive car driver used to getting their way, bad aura, they'll probably wait.  Tough call, though.

If there's a traffic light ahead, that's a factor.  If it's red, the odds are greater that I'll let the car in, as it isn't going to cost me any time.  If it's been a long green and I'm in a hurry (and isn't everybody), then probably not.  I can't tell you how many times I've let someone in only to have them get through on the yellow and I catch the red.  And if I've just let in a couple of people over the past few blocks, then it's somebody else's turn to be nice, as I'm starting to feel like a patsy if I'm the only one letting people in.

There are definitely some drivers I'm predisposed to let in.  A parent with children in the car (I know what's that's like), big rig truck drivers, old ladies (that's somebody's granny), and anybody with a good vibe gets priority.  And anybody who looks like they've been sitting there a while and looks reasonably normal is somebody I'd like to help.

But here's the thing, and I remember seeing this on a Seinfeld episode so I know a lot of people feel this way.  Isn't it aggravating when you let somebody in and you don't get the wave, the nod, the smile--- nothing!  Now I know that the joy is supposed to be in the giving, but darn it, I want that wave, and feel like a chump if I don't get it, as though I've just let a bad person get over on me. But I have noticed that if I let somebody in, the odds seem higher that that person will also let somebody in.

*For the younger readers, the expression "roll down your window" comes from the olden days when people actually had to manually crank down their car windows.