The Silence of the Lambs

"If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all," "Silence is golden," and "Better to be quiet and have people wonder if you are a fool than to speak and let people know that you are." [paraphrasing that last one] The power that is silence. When it is said that nature abhors a vacuum, nowhere better does it apply than with conversation. From the annoying "What's wrong?" to the curious "What are you thinking?" many people are uncomfortable with another's silence (and of course those most annoyed are doomed to be linked to the "strong silent types" who may be naturally quiet or unnaturally passive-aggressive). I have found that in professional situations, for instance, silence is a powerful tool. In lectures, it gives emphasis and pause for thought; in discussion it communicates contemplation, and in negotiation it is power.

But there are other silent people hiding among us. While a refreshing change from the "attention whores," the socially unconscious (that's right, you with the cell phone, you in the theater, you in the third row), and the ubiquitous loud talkers, these quiet ones are not emulating Gary Cooper, but are in fact the meek who hope to inherit the earth. While too many move ahead by relentless self-promotion, too many others have their heads handed to them when they stick their necks out, so too many play it safe, keeping quiet. And this is a pretty successful strategy in its own way, as the rise may be slow, but the fall won't be fast. But is that who you really want to be? To quote one of my absolute favorite lines of poetry (and as it turns out that as an insensitive lout I don't have a lot of favorite lines of poetry), from Thomas Gray's Elegy Written in a Country Churchyard:

"Full many a flower is born to blush unseen.
And waste its sweetness on the desert air."